Unidentifed Funny Objects Read Along Part IV

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ShvartsmanUFOUnidentified Funny Objects is a collection of short stories, all science fiction or fantasy, that are ridiculous, punny, humorous, and sometimes just plain silly. Back in February or March, I brought you an interview with the editor of Unidentified Funny Objects, Alex Shvartman. He’s pretty fascinating to read about, so check that out if you get a chance. There is also the read-at-your-own-pace read along going on on Goodreads for this book. Obviously, I got a little sidetracked with life, but now I am back into this book and plan to finish it out with regular read along updates. Alex Shvartman also has some free short stories of this same ilk up on the UFO website. I have included links to the authors’ websites when I could easily find them.

An Unchanted Sword by Jeff Stehman

Mathos is a traveling swordsman with an unchanted sword. While Fercas and Trent have enchanted weapons, a sword and morning star respectively. Sayer is only blessed with an enchanted whittling knife. Unfortunately, trolls show up in town and their hide can’t be pierced by regular enchanted weapons. This was a quick and clever piece that I enjoyed.

The Real Thing by Don Sakers

The Ran’chit are bug aliens resembling cockroaches. Jane and other humans hang out at a spacebar that is also frequented by the Ran’chit. A minor conflict is followed by a discussion on green house gases. Cute.

2001 Revisited via 1969 by Bruce Golden

Hal is the ship’s computer and poor unfortunate Dave is locked out of the ship. He really wants in. This tale was a spoof on Arthur C. Clarke’s 2001. It was short and silly and I almost laughed. Perhaps it was just me as I didn’t particularly care for the original 2001 so the spoof didn’t do much for me.

First Date by Jamie Lackey

Leanne has a brother (Harry) who happens to be a super werewolf. Josh, who is a monster hunter, comes along and complicates matters. This was a clever urban fantasy that I quite enjoyed.

One-Hand Tantra by Ferrett Steinmetz

Loefwyn is a masturbitician. There’s also One-eyed Griselda. You might have guessed already that this story is a series of masturbation jokes. I laughed at the first few, but then grew a little tired of the theme. Still, it made me laugh.

Of Mat and Math by Anatoly Belilovsky

Arquimedes Hildalgo Ibarruri is a mathematician at an airport. But the timeline jumps around between the past, present, and future. This tale has some Spanish and Russian words, including plenty of Russian cuss words (yes, I am always entertained by foreign cuss words). While this was an interesting piece, I am not sure I understood it. Entertained by it, I was; understood it, not quite.

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